Teen Spirit

March 25, 2018 Sociocultural Issues, Youth Issues No Comments

An adolescent brain is not just an immature brain. There is a purpose: daring to experiment in an open quest for meaning.

The term ‘adolescent,’ etymologically ‘one who is becoming an adult’ arguably puts the norm on adulthood: adolescence as a preparation for adult life, complexified by hormonal changes and an ongoing cognitive and emotional, even neurophysiological maturation of the brain.

Does this make adolescence second-best?

Adolescence (including puberty, being a teenager) is like ‘being born into’ an adult world of societal meaning. An adolescent is new to this and thus also more prone to be ‘wild’ in the sense of not taking old norms for granted. He wants to build his own truths, especially in domains involving depth. As such, he spontaneously questions rigid authority – rules for rules’ sake.

After all, it’s an age of important decisions that may direct one’s further life: professionally, relationally, morally… Challenging the system may make one find or create a better place in it. Moreover, that’s also good for the system itself.

Adolescence is not so much a fight against ‘authority’ as it is a genuine search for meaning.

True, this may sound like a sixties’ view on the new generation. I would say ‘eternally new’, or ‘original – close to the origin’. With a fresh eye, an adolescent tends to be more openly interested in the big issues of life, like ‘what is the purpose of living’?

Sometimes old age brings this back. Or – wisdom.

Adolescence is wanting to see the borderlines from both sides.

This involves a degree of risk-taking and possible dangers: getting stuck in a blind alley, going too far in some direction…. If the adult world puts too much rules over meaning, then, pardon me, an adolescent may even react as a ‘rebel without a cause.’ There may be a cause, yet it’s meaning that makes him rally.

True, this sounds even more sixties.

This is not to say that adolescents cannot use a lot of support of course.

A few tips when you are an adult with teenager(s):

Don’t fight your teenager. See his behavior as a fight for meaning. Show yourself as you are. Above all, don’t try to ‘play the teenager’ but please see your child as your personal coach in at least a few facets. Adolescents can be a mirror to adults, who may see in this mirror what they have inadvertently lost. Try to become ‘wild’ again if you like, in an adult fashion. With this as common ground, you may grow towards each other. In the best case, an adult is not someone who has lost his adolescence but who has been growing through it – and maybe still is. Being in contact with young people is especially nice in this respect.

An ideal growth towards adulthood is through integration, not substitution, of adolescent values.

In this, one can find much of Open Leadership!

Does this last sentence surprise you?

Leave a Reply

Related Posts

Rules are for People

Rules can support or suppress, depending on whether they arise from ego or from Compassion. In a world filled with rules, this blog explores why only those that serve the total person are worth keeping. This becomes ever more urgent in an age of growing intelligence, both human and artificial. The central distinction Ego wants Read the full article…

The Life that Could Have Been

Every woman with a child in her belly has an emotional bond with it. That is why she calls it a child. If this child’s life is abruptly ended, we have an abortion. When? To some women, this may be the moment of the positive predictor test. To other women, it may be much later. Read the full article…

The World is a Boat

The world is not many separate boats but one vessel. In the coming storms, separation will not save us. To sail forward, we need a broader vision of belonging, a stronger inner hull, and a new kind of lighthouse. My People is Everyone — that is the wind in our sails, the anchor of our Read the full article…

Translate »