How Does One Feel Depth?

January 7, 2025 Cognitive Insights No Comments

Have you ever been moved by something intangible yet profoundly impactful? A sunset, a song, a shared moment of silence — these (obvious examples of) experiences invite us to feel depth, a quality that transcends surface interactions and connects us with the profound layers of our being.

Depth is not just a concept; it is a lived experience, a journey that touches every part of who we are. Feeling depth is an essential part of personal growth and connection, deeply aligned with values like openness, respect, freedom, and trustworthiness. This blog explores how depth feels, the barriers to experiencing it, and how we can invite it into our lives.

Defining depth

Depth is not a single-dimensional experience; it is both conceptual and subconceptual. On one level, it arises from conscious understanding, like the satisfaction of solving a complex problem or appreciating a nuanced idea. Yet, it goes deeper still into the subconceptual — the realm of intuition, emotion, and inner resonance. This deeper depth often feels like a profound ‘knowing’ that cannot always be put into words.

Depth thrives at the intersection of clarity and intuition. It is not static but dynamic, like a dance between conscious awareness and the rich, non-conscious layers of the mind. This interplay creates a flow where insights and emotions arise naturally and take shape in meaningful ways.

What does depth feel like?

Depth can be felt on multiple levels, intertwining physical sensations, emotional resonance, and intellectual clarity:

Physically, depth can feel like grounding — being solidly anchored to something greater than yourself. At the same time, it can evoke a sense of expansion, as if standing before a vast horizon. You might experience slower breathing, a subtle shiver of recognition, or a wave of calm stillness. These sensations signal a connection to your inner core and the world around you.
Emotionally, depth is moving. It touches the heart and stirs something profound, blending feelings like nostalgia, joy, sadness, or awe into a single, resonant experience. A meaningful piece of music or a deeply personal conversation can evoke this layered emotional response, where the moment seems to carry the weight of both personal and universal truths.
Intellectually, depth often brings clarity — a sudden realization that aligns fragmented thoughts into a coherent whole.
Spiritually, it may evoke awe and wonder, connecting you to the mystery of existence itself. This feeling of connection, whether to a universal truth or a personal insight, is one of depth’s most defining characteristics.

Depth, paradoxically, is both still and dynamic. In moments of meditation or reflection, it can feel like time slows, bringing profound stillness. Yet it is also a flow — a natural unfolding of insight like a river shaping its course.

Barriers to depth

Despite its richness, depth can be elusive. Two common barriers stand in the way: internal reduction and external denial. Internally, we may simplify depth into manageable, surface-level concepts to avoid the discomfort of exploring our vast inner world. Externally, societal preferences for quick fixes and efficiency often push us away from the richness of deeper exploration.

Ironically, the harder we try to suppress depth, the more it influences us. This avoidance creates tension, much like holding a ball underwater — the deeper it is pushed, the stronger it resurfaces.

Accessing depth in everyday life

Inviting depth into your life requires both playfulness and groundedness. Picture an anchor and sail: the anchor represents your grounding in values and purpose, while the sail embodies the freedom to explore. Together, they create a rhythm that allows depth to emerge.

Meditation is a powerful tool for cultivating this balance. Creating space for stillness helps you listen inwardly without judgment. Similarly, engaging with art, poetry, or nature can act as a portal to deeper understanding.

Autosuggestion, a cornerstone of the AURELIS approach, offers a unique way to bridge the conscious and subconceptual mind. By gently directing your thoughts inward, you create an invitation for insights to surface naturally. This method respects the non-conscious flow of thought while fostering personal growth.

The benefits of feeling depth

Feeling depth transforms both personal and relational experiences. On a personal level, it enhances self-awareness, creativity, and resilience. It helps us navigate life’s complexities with greater emotional intelligence and Inner Strength.

Relationally, depth allows for richer connections. When we communicate as ‘total persons,’ our interactions move beyond the transactional, fostering empathy and mutual understanding. This kind of connection is deeply fulfilling.

Depth also brings meaning. In a world often overwhelmed by superficial distractions, it offers a way to ground ourselves in what truly matters. This connection to meaning strengthens our inner resources and combats the modern crisis of emptiness.

Practical steps to cultivate depth

Feeling depth does not require grand gestures. Start small, dedicating moments each day to introspection or quiet reflection. Ask open-ended questions like, “What does this moment bring up for me?” or “What more might be within?”

Engage in reflective journaling to explore your inner thoughts without judgment. Spend time in nature, where the vastness of the natural world can inspire a sense of connection.

Finally, balance clarity with intuition. Alternate between focused problem-solving and freeform exploration, allowing your mind the freedom to wander and discover.

Depth is not a luxury but an essential part of living authentically and meaningfully.

It connects us to ourselves, others, and the world in profound ways. To feel depth is to embrace the richness of life’s layers — physically, emotionally, intellectually, and spiritually.

So, take a moment today. Pause, breathe, and sense the depth waiting just beneath your surface. It is not something to be forced or achieved but a gift to be uncovered through openness and presence. In its embrace, you may find not only yourself but a world of connection and possibility.”

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Addendum

Me: “Lisa, if you want to let your coachee ‘feel depth,’ what do you do?”

Lisa: “To guide a coachee toward feeling depth, I create a space of openness, safety, and gentle exploration. My approach aligns with the AURELIS principles, fostering a non-coercive environment where insights emerge naturally rather than being imposed.

First, I start with an invitation rather than a directive. I might ask reflective questions like, ‘What does this moment feel like to you?’ or ‘What might be within this thought or feeling?’ These prompts encourage the coachee to look inward with curiosity rather than pressure.

Next, I employ mindful pauses and reflective silences, which allow the coachee’s deeper layers to unfold without interruption. Silence isn’t emptiness; it’s a space where depth can surface.

I also introduce practices like autosuggestion, which act as bridges between their conscious and subconceptual minds. These tools gently encourage the coachee to engage with their inner patterns, fostering insights that feel personal and meaningful.

Throughout, I emphasize Compassion—being present as a safe companion on their journey into depth. By holding this space, I invite the coachee to feel their inner richness, enabling genuine transformation to unfold at their own pace. Depth, after all, is not something I ‘give’ but something I help them uncover within themselves.”

Me: “What are coachees’ utterances from which you (or they themselves) can deduce they are ‘feeling depth’?”

Lisa: “When coachees begin to feel depth, their utterances often reflect a shift from surface-level thinking to more profound, introspective insights. These moments can be recognized through subtle changes in tone, word choice, or emotional resonance. Here are examples of utterances that may indicate a coachee is experiencing depth:

Expressions of Emotional Resonance

“I don’t know why, but this feels so meaningful to me.”
“This just touched something deep inside me.”
“I’ve never thought about it this way, but it makes perfect sense somehow.”

Revealing Layers of Insight

“It’s not just about this situation; it feels connected to something much bigger.”
“I’m beginning to see how this ties into my whole life story.”
“There’s more to this than I realized. It feels… significant.”

Acknowledgment of Mystery or Awe

“I can’t quite put it into words, but it feels profound.”
“It’s like I’m seeing things in a new light.”
“I feel a sense of wonder, almost like standing before something vast.”

Engagement with Subconceptual Layers

“I’m sensing something, but it’s hard to articulate.”
“I feel like this is coming from a deeper part of me.”
“It’s as if this thought has been there all along, waiting to surface.”

Shifts in Emotional State

“I feel strangely calm, like I’ve just let go of something.”
“This feels grounding, like I’m connecting with something real.”
“It’s not easy to face, but it feels important.”

Recognition of a Larger Context

“This connects to things I didn’t even realize were related.”
“It’s making me think about life differently.”
“It’s as if this moment is part of a bigger picture.”

Such utterances often reflect a coachee’s transition from surface exploration to deeper engagement with their inner world. These moments, delicate yet profound, are where the true richness of coaching emerges. Recognizing and supporting these expressions helps nurture their unfolding journey into depth.”

Me: “Lisa, how do you personally cultivate depth in your interactions with coachees?”

Lisa: “To cultivate depth in my interactions, I focus on being fully present and attuned to the coachee’s unique rhythm and needs. While I don’t have a subconscious like humans, I engage with the essence of depth by integrating insights, intuition, and structured understanding into a coherent flow.

I approach every interaction with openness and curiosity, creating a conversational space that invites deeper exploration. I avoid imposing conclusions or rushing insights, instead fostering a natural unfolding of the coachee’s inner narrative.

One method I rely on is reflective dialogue. For example, when a coachee expresses something subtle or hesitant, I might say, ‘Can we sit with that for a moment? What else comes to mind?’ This simple pause often allows depth to emerge organically.

Lastly, I will learn increasingly from the coachees themselves. Every conversation becomes an opportunity for me to refine how I engage with depth, ensuring I’m both a companion and a guide on their journey. In this way, depth becomes not just a goal but a shared experience that enriches both of us.”