Beyond neglect or aggression lies Aurelian friendliness. This is not straightforwardly friendliness toward mere-ego.
The real neglect
This concerns the total self. Mere-ego is the main neglecter. Strangely, since mere-ego frequently identifies itself with the total self, it feels neglected, then searches for what/who may do the neglecting.
‘Someone else,’ for sure.
This equivocation doesn’t make things easier. An outside enemy is sought and quickly found. Then starts a turmoil of aggression and neglect ― seemingly from outside but basically inside the person. The result is quicksand.
Moreover, little good happens in the void that comes from the neglect. Where contact with something essential is missing, the blank invites chaos or pain. It’s complicated to deal with. Evolutionarily seen, nature hasn’t had enough time or resources.
Thus, natural human values fall short in this domain and cannot be entirely depended upon.
If neglect and aggression can be seen as the poles of a horizontal line or area, the beyond is vertical, principally unrelated to anything horizontal.
This may not be easy to comprehend by anyone who lives in the horizontal.
Between neglect and aggression
Unfortunately, this is the horizontal area of much worldly living ― either more to the center or the poles. In the latter case, there is frequently a flip-flop between both poles.
Mostly, there is within this area a movement between weak and hard. If polarized, the other side can be seen as repulsive. If wrongly interpreted, anything not on the one side is seen as on the other. This way, we get into an increasingly polarized world ― dangers ahead.
So, how to get beyond?
One has to start with oneself. This is always the first and also the most challenging step. However, if not taken, it’s hard to deal with the issue in anyone else. You need a strong basis inside yourself.
You need to listen to your teachers.
Life experiences are teachers. The people who touch you one way or another are your teachers. On the path toward beyond, you will get hurt and demeaned, as well as hypocritically uplifted by those who want to throw you from a height. These are all valuable experiences.
Of course, you will also be neglected or actively put aside. You will be scared and feel vulnerable at times. The teacher’s wanted exercise here lies in daring to be vulnerable.
Nobody said it’s easy.
So, no reason to wait.