The Sun Always Shines

January 1, 2022 AURELIS Coaching No Comments

This is a very deeply ingrained attitude of “it’s always OK”.

►►► AURELIS Coaching for Coaches (read this first)

So deeply ingrained that it can look very different on the surface.

You’re a bit grumpy or even having a contrarian day… and yet the background, the color scheme on which everything takes place, is completely OK.

The sun always shines there.

This can initially be a pose that you take, but then a sincere pose.

It is not hypocrisy, because it is about an attitude that you more and more naturally WANT to adopt. You are not bringing into this someone you are not, for you WANT to be this deep within yourself and therefore you ARE it deep within.

It just has to show itself.

Thinking positive? A positive attitude to life? A glass half full of optimism? The difference may seem subtle at times, yet it is substantial.

This is about a real being that you invite deep within yourself.

You don’t force anything. You don’t push through. You invite.

You suggest.

When it comes (like a “cloud that permeates you”), it is good. If it doesn’t come, it’s just as good. The sun always shines in this domain.

My daughter wants to leave home and that hurts me so much.

How old is she?

23

And she wants to leave.

Yes.

[Here I feel a major multi-layer crack and I name it right away.]

Away from ‘you’.

Yes.

And you don’t want her to go!

No!

That’s beautiful! Did you have many good times?

Oh yeah.

Had a lot of fun together.

Yes [gives some examples.]

I see you cared a lot about each other.

Yes.

And so still care.

Yes [moist eyes]

If she goes, can you let her go completely and then when she comes back, can you let her be back completely?

That would be best huh.

Especially for her…

And for me too.

Yes.

I haven’t lost her.

No.

And she doesn’t really want to “get away from you” either.

No.

Nice.

[Coach and coachee both smile and think about their children.]

Etc.

Leave a Reply

Related Posts

Burnout prevention for caregivers: give care, but do not ‘give it away’

Caregivers can get into the habit of ‘giving themselves away’ too much. Take care. You can learn to give without giving yourself away. ‘Giving away’ feels like you lose something. If this is your feeling as a caregiver, time and time again, then little by little you can start feeling bad. It’s as if others Read the full article…

Subtle Recognition and Response to Unspoken Needs in Coaching

In the world of coaching, what remains unsaid often holds as much value as the spoken word. Coachees may come with a specific question or issue, yet beneath the surface lie deeper emotions, unacknowledged concerns, or unrealized aspirations. The art of recognizing and responding to these unspoken needs is a cornerstone of effective, Compassionate coaching. Read the full article…

Vision!

A coach and a leader have in common what is perhaps their main asset: the ability to ‘see what no other has seen before’, a future that is at the same time personal and universal. [Note: this is not an easy text.] This is not about eye-vision of course. In the coach’s case it may Read the full article…

Translate »