Each formal human- or Lisa-coaching (or job interview) ends with a G.I.M.O.: Goals – Insights – Motivations – Obstructions.
A G.I.M.O. is succinct and set up within the dialogue between the coach or Lisa and the user.
It serves as
- a focus to work towards
- a take-home for the user (as homework)
- a pick-up at the following coaching
- a tool of communication with others (after user consent)
- a concrete proof to the user (and others) that something worthwhile has been accomplished at each coaching.
De-crystallization of G.I.M.O.
To crystallize what happened during the previous session towards the end of an AURELIS. coaching session, one can schematically think of what ‘G.I.M.O.’ is an acronym for:
What are short/long-term goals that the coachee can set for himself? Goals can help maintain direction, prevent too much chaos.
Setting an exact time in the future when a specific (sub)goal should be achieved is not always recommended. It can lead to forcing oneself to achieve that goal, even if one is not ready for it. Lest one can avoid such an ‘aggressive struggle,’ it can be used as an additional motivation. Of course: if the goal is not achieved, it can have a demotivating effect. It’s a double-edged sword.
A well-set goal is an autosuggestive tool. You know what you want, and by knowing this, it is also a request for help to your deeper self. So let the goal come as completely as possible from the coachee himself and at the same time make sure that it is sufficiently ‘deep’: that it corresponds to the flow of the deeper self. A good AURELIS coach can work towards both of these together:
“Can we agree on this-or-that now?” [ = Is this OK for your deeper self?]
“How does it feel [to your deeper self] when we say you’ve thought this-or-that over by next time?”
A goal can be, for example, to listen to an AURELIS session or to practically integrate an agreed item into daily life.
An AURELIS coach is a ‘wise person’. This is someone who, through study, experiences with others, and also a lot of own experiences (including with AURELIS) and life experience, has learned to make contact with the deeper self in a good way. Wisdom is not knowledge. The difference lies in ‘depth’: the domain in which a lot of things can be connected with a lot simultaneously, in which broad patterns can be formed / discovered / used. If knowledge means looking through a keyhole at what is in a room, wisdom means opening the door and stepping in.
By being closely involved and attentively observing, you will always arrive at some wisdom during an AURELIS coaching session together with the coachee. If all is well, it is not ‘deep and heavy’ but rather ‘fresh and airy’ — a balloon. If you let go of the cord, it sometimes risks flying away. You can prevent this to some extent by working with silences around such balloons during the session. One of the advantages of silences is that they can ‘mark’. A silence like an exclamation mark: this is important! You can then come back to it at the end of an AURELIS coaching session.
“Did you think this-or-that was important?”
“I think there is a lot to learn from this-or-that.”
What are deep, living motivations for the coachee to cherish the insights found together as ‘pearls of wisdom’ and to realize the goals?
The deeper self is very sensitive to the ‘here and now.’ So, always bring motivations to the ‘here and now.’ Even when it comes to the long-term:
“How does it now feel to, in your immediate environment, work towards this goal for next year?”
“Do you like to look ahead already now to your slimmer figure on the beach this summer?”
“Can you imagine here and now what it will feel like?”
Success is very motivating. Success creates success². The value of this is symbolic. In other words, it doesn’t matter whether it is a big success or a small success. A small success can have huge symbolic importance. So support the coachee in validating this. A well-validated success is once again deep autosuggestion. In this way, you directly point the direction for your deeper self. Almost before you know it, you’re on the move.
This is possible ‘resistance,’ in other words: reasons not to wish for the desired change after all. People are in a wish-boat towards the North, but at the same time the current is moving fast towards the South. You know it:
“I want it all so immediately that I can’t even begin with it.”
“Tell me what to do. I will do anything for it (within my boat).”
Elsewhere (in the AURELIS syllabus), possible causes of “resistance” are described. It is good to repeat these sometimes so that you recognize them in due time. However, only present what the coachee can accept on his initiative. Otherwise, you run the risk of needlessly increasing the resistance yourself.
The main resistance, and often present behind others, is this: the deeper self does not want to be changed. This gives a particular implication for working with AURELIS. In all kinds of superficial, ‘cosmetic’ change (placebo, symptomatic therapy), the change is not deep. The deeper self is not touched by this and allows it. A hedgehog only raises its spines when it perceives possible ‘danger.’ When the deeper self feels that a change can go deeper than just a cosmetic layer, it becomes more sensitive. This is a good sign: it means that you – probably – are going deeper. It is then all the more essential to deal with this properly: friendly, inviting, supportive, not just pulling or pushing. Note: this is not an attitude of naive pacifism or naive laissez-faire, but genuine peace-loving and freedom-loving. Towards the end of every AURELIS-coaching, you can again emphasize that it is not about being changed. Each ‘objection’ can then be shown as a positive drive for growth.
It’s a good idea to reserve space for the G.I.M.O. during the coaching session. It comes across as very respectful if you can conjure this up as an additional gift at the end. It is a profound sign of attention, and of course, it also helps to keep your attention sharp during the session / to focus the session itself. The G.I.M.O. can also be interesting if you want to communicate the essence of an AURELIS coaching session to a referrer.