Coaching is everywhere

October 2, 2017 AURELIS Coaching No Comments

Communication is three things: spontaneously expressing oneself, providing information, influencing others. Plus: being-communicated-to, of course. Look closely and you see coaching.

When people really communicate, they coach each other and themselves. They invite some deeper meaning to be considered. They motivate towards change from inside out. This is not hard or heavy. On the contrary, it is quite light. And it can show everywhere. It can be a gesture. It can be small talk. It can be a dance. Nonverbal communication. It can be a glance. A smile. People communicate in innumerate ways and these can all be a kind of coaching.

What is needed for it to be coaching, is openness. Looking at each other without preconceptions that fill the space in between. It’s always OK.

The other person can communicate whatever he or she has in mind. And you too, as ‘coach’, can do so. Because you respect each other, you will not try to hurt each other. You both will try to let the other grow, even if it’s only a very tiny little bit. This comes naturally.

A true coach is someone who takes this natural human inclination a step further. He or she makes himself or herself into a kind of coaching instrument by heightening inside what is naturally already very much there. Making oneself truly open is to the coach the main work to do. Of course, this goes together with a lot of baggage, intellectually, emotionally.

The idea is not to become like a child again except in what the child has not yet unlearned: the openness towards others and towards the surroundings as all new.

To the young child, everything is new. To the adult also, everything can be like new. Even in situations that the adult has already lived through many times. The adult coach will through this not forget himself or herself. All the memories may be consciously there or may play an unconscious part in shaping experiences and communications. That is not a problem. It is even a big advantage. Through openness, the coach can come very close to the other person, maybe someone who is explicitly seeking advice. Through lots of background, the coach can show alternative ways to be with the issue that the other person needs to work on, or to live with. This is the case in an explicit coaching situation. It can also be the case in life in general. I think and hope that we evolve towards a world in which this will be increasingly present and appreciated.

Leave a Reply

Related Posts

Human & Lisa in Coaches’ Education

Becoming an AURELIS coach is a deep personal growth process. Unlike traditional training programs that focus on techniques, AURELIS coaching is about growing into a way of being. This requires both self-reflection and real human experience, which is why a hybrid model of education – combining human mentors and Lisa – creates the best environment Read the full article…

Reinforcement Learning and AURELIS Coaching

Reinforcement Learning is a way of thinking that applies to the animal kingdom as well as A.I. Also, it is deeply related to AURELIS coaching. Please read about Reinforcement Learning (R.L.) R.L. in AURELIS coaching Such coaching is always (auto)suggestive. The coach doesn’t impose or even give plain advice. The coaching is tentative without being Read the full article…

The AURELIS Coach as Mirror of the Soul

The mirror doesn’t give advice. It doesn’t direct or push. In AURELIS, coaching is not about applying pressure — but offering presence. The coach, like a mirror, reflects what is already there in the coachee, waiting to be seen. In that reflection, something sacred can awaken. The mirror of the soul is not surface mimicry Read the full article…

Translate »