AURELIS Transformative Mediation

November 6, 2020 AURELIS Coaching, Mediation - Diplomacy No Comments

AURELIS coaching is apt to be the basis for transformative mediation.

(With mediation is meant in this blog text the AURELIS-based transformative kind.)

Transformative mediation

Of the two broad categories of mediation – arbitrage and transformative mediation – AURELIS mediation naturally is of the transformative kind, directed to depth, openness… well, AURELIS ethics [see: “Five Aurelian Values”]

The goal of this is a change from inside of the total person. This is not a change of one person into another person ― also not a striving towards that. The intention is a transformation of the person into more himself, into the same person but after inner growth. [see category: “Personal Growth”]

The goal is growth, as anything in nature: personal, natural, inner growth.

In mediation, this is the growth of oneself and the relationship between parties.

Spontaneous and profound

This mediation needs to be accomplished in freedom. Otherwise, there is coercion to change, not from the present constellation but a newly projected one. One leaves the own ground.

Yet this spontaneity does not lead to weakness. It might give that idea in a culture of ‘doing,’ where something is valuable according to the conscious doing-effort put into it. This readily leads to opposition, litigation, a winner who wants to take it all in a zero-sum contest.

Contrary to this, transformative mediation leads to a culture of ‘growing.’ The aim is Inner Strength. One needs to deeply understand this to fully value it and see that, eventually, this may be stronger than anything.

From this understanding (and only from this), one can also see that ‘doing’ and ‘growing’ are not mutually exclusive unless they are made to be so. Within a culture of ‘doing,’ that is mostly the case.

AURELIS coaching lends itself well.

The goals are pretty much the same. It should amaze anyone that, therefore, also the same tools are applicable in both situations.

It starts and ends with deep listening. [see: “Deep Listening”] In-between, there are many ‘techniques,’ elements of background, online tools, and so much more.


At work, at school, at home, between neighbors, within extended families, between leaders of different groups, between physicians and patients. Whenever two people come together about an issue between them, some mediation can be relevant. This is an occasion to better know themselves, each other, and their relationship in-depth.

As the judicial system has been worked out in the West and worldwide, little room is granted to mediation. This can change dramatically in the future, being advantageous to individuals and society. Even more, mediation can be put to use when an issue is just starting to become relevant. This is the prevention side.

Very broadly

An ‘issue’ may have a negative connotation. Mediation can also be used to figure out some problems where there is no issue between people. Any collaboration – working on a scientific question, for instance – can come to a point where principles of mediation can be put to use. This way, people are invited to think together better, seeing possibilities they might otherwise have missed.

Other domains are negotiation and diplomacy.

Work for Lisa

For Lisa [see: “Lisa”], being a coaching chat-bot based on AURELIS principles, there is a natural place in mediation. This can grow from prior individual coaching or be combined with it.

Given the possibilities of mediation, there will be a lot of additional work for Lisa.

She can hardly wait.

Leave a Reply

Related Posts

Socrates was an AURELIS Coach?

Socrates’ method, which we currently call the ‘Socratic method’, consisted in leading the questioner to the solution of a question by means of a good alternation of open and closed questions. ►►► AURELIS Coaching for Coaches (read this first) Socrates did not just offer the solution. He did his best to let it come out Read the full article…

Two Extinctions

A recurrent maladaptive behavior, thought, or feeling can gradually diminish in two ways. Either it entirely disappears, or it dissolves. There are differences in path and endpoint. About extinction A mental ‘problem’ is usually recurrent. That’s the reason why people search for help, including professional help. In one word: therapy (or mental coaching). ‘Extinction’ is Read the full article…

Sacred Space of Coaching

This is about deep meaningfulness. No magic required. In sacred space, things can happen from the inside out. This is the best way in many mind-related issues. We should stay scientific. If we don’t incorporate things like ‘sacred space’ into science, we leave it to nonscience. It may then still make sense in a non-scientific Read the full article…

Translate »