Eros in Unification

January 1, 2023 Love & Relationship No Comments

You ― and Me ― and Me in You ― and You in Me.

Sex and so much more

Of course, eros in unification is about sex ― the unification of bodies. And also about the lives in which those bodies exist. Then, also about two special cells repeating a game that probably started in the ocean billions of years ago.

The ocean still lingers on in how a child develops in the female body. The oceanic feeling still lingers on in how two people may experience their unification. This can be seen even at the level of neurotransmitters.

The feeling can come with a sea of love.

A longing for unification

In ancient Greece, the erotic longing between a man and a woman was deemed to result from a feeling of separation in both and the mutual desire to resolve this.

The Greeks had something to go. Another take is that erotic desire transcends any separate existence. The desire is unified to the core ― the realization being only the enactment of what is already there. This realization can be physical. It can also be symbolic. One can find the latter, here and there, now and then, profoundly within a religious context, where it can also be ‘physically symbolic’ sometimes.

Erotic mysticism

If you, modern person, think this is unreal, then I invite you to explore the Internet on ‘minne’ and ‘Hadewych,’ the medieval mystic from Brabant ― where I was poised to be born centuries later. Hadewych was a prolific writer of exquisite poetry in which she sang about the love (‘minne’) between God and human ― involving body and mind and the desire to unify not only in the afterlife but also passionately in the present.

She was not the only mystic who did so. No wonder some had problems with overly scholastic theologians. Nevertheless, it shows us one certainty:

The erotic desire for unification is deeply human.

Although not always validated, this is hugely important in any sexual act. Without it, there is only the purely hormonal – unlovingly chemical – doing. One can talk of rape: a person’s temporary high at the possible expense of another’s profoundly meaningful suffering. Many people don’t know how deep this can go because, well, they don’t understand human depth in the first place.

On a cheerful note, the unification can be more exciting than the sex itself. For reasons unknown to me (cultural? ― personal?), I think ‘female’ first, but ‘male’ can be equally involved. Nevertheless, for the guys, it may be specifically important to take a deep unification look at the following.

Foreplay

This is not a play that comes before the serious stuff. It is the serious stuff, starting sometime before penetration – if any – and going on the whole time of ‘intercourse,’ ending sometime after the start of penetration.

It’s better, therefore, to see foreplay as the invitation to become erotically one. Hadewych’s poetry is one way. Any other invitation can be another way ― in clothing, movements, talk, anything. Even, as just indicated, in the penetration itself.

Do you want me?

Do you need me?

Do you love me?

Ah.