Being friendly to yourself

Heal Your Self 

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No selfishness

You should not consider 'being friendly towards yourself' such as has been developed in this indication, as a kind of selfishness. In fact the opposite is true. Here a deep form of friendliness is intended, therefore not for yourself as 'ego' but for yourself as a total person. This goes beyond the dualistic 'me' versus 'the other'. Being friendly to yourself, eventually means being friendly to 'the other', the whole humanity, even all 'sentient beings' as for instance is central in Buddhism.

No altruism

It is however, also no altruism, because this assumes equally well the same dualism. In friendliness, the care or compassion for the other originates from a notion that entirely in depth there is no distinction. 'I' and the other are then to a large degree equal. What is friendly for 'me' is automatically also friendly for 'you'.

Friendliness as the warmth of the sun that makes a flower open itself

You can consider this friendliness as the warmth of the sun that makes you open yourself like a flower. In this image, the top of the flower bud is your ego, while the open flower is your total person. Notice that the flower that opens, does not lose its ego. However, the ego 'changes' in the sense that it is merged into the whole of the open flower. The warmth of the sun too, is in fact the warmth, the love of yourself for yourself. Self love without selfishness.

A friendly desire is a desire without frustration

A desire that leads to frustration is actually almost purely frustration. A friendly desire on the other hand knows no frustration. It is a joy in itself, a goal in itself. If the goal that is desired, is not reached, then the most important goal, the desire itself, is always reached regardless.
Autosuggestion sessions
  • You look into a mirror and see pure friendliness
    You look in your imagination into a mirror at yourself. You see yourself purely as friendliness and react to this by radiating friendliness towards your mirror image.
    Play Session
  • Friendliness as the warmth of the sun that makes a flower open itself
    You imagine yourself as a flower bud. The sun is friendly, shining its warm rays upon you that causes your flower to open itself. You are entirely receptive to the friendly rays of the sun.
    Play Session
  • A friendly desire
    This is a mere consideration of the idea that a friendly desire does not lead to frustration. This session is an explanation of this, but at the same time you are taken along in this explanation towards a deep internal wisdom about this.
    Play Session
  • You feel friendliness to yourself as friendliness to everyone
    You start with being friendly to yourself, first in a simple way and then deeply. You see that at this level, you are most friendly to yourself by also being friendly to others.
    Play Session
  • You examine your own day and see that you do your best in everything
    You examine the past day and see that in everything you did or didn't, you actually did your best. Where it went less well perhaps, this is because this is all you are able to do. This fills you with a great feeling of friendliness.
    Play Session
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